• LwL@lemmy.world
    1·
    11 months ago

    I’ve been wondering about definitions there for some time now. I do constantly wish i was a woman, and transitioning is something I’ve considered for quite a while but ultimately am not doing for two reasons

    1. i barely have my social anxiety under control enough to function normally (at least most of the time) and have some degree of social life, so the thought of transitioning before it is something accepted by >99% of society is horrifying.

    2. one of the primary aspects I dislike about being male is my appearance, but I also have at least found a style I’m mostly comfortable with and believe that with my current body state I’d just dislike how I look even more if I tried to present female, as it’d still be far from what I’d wanna look like.

    Which is to say, if being trans were to stop being a social and political problem and I lost weight I’d start transitioning in a heartbeat, and I sure relate to a lot of experiences I see transfems talk about, but I feel like calling myself “trans” in this state isn’t very fitting regardless since I feel like “trans” implies “not having decided not to transition”. But maybe I’m wrong and it’s more flexible than that.

    Sorry for randomly dumping all that under a meme but it’s been on my mind for a while and this felt like a reasonably appropriate place for it lol

      • LwL@lemmy.world
        1·
        11 months ago

        Well then, do I have something for you that I saw mentioned in another post and has really helped answer this (funny how that happens just when I decide to actually talk about it, but it’s a state of mind of wanting to look into it i guess). https://genderdysphoria.fyi/en , aka “the gender dysphoria bible”.

        Now after reading that, the social anxiety aspect is the only thing stopping me anymore I think, though that has dictated most of my life for as long as I can remember, so I’m unlikely to get past it without societal change.

        To answer the main question of my post, considering yourself trans and just deciding not to transition is apparently just fine, because there are tons of reasons you might come to that decision.

        Though I think if I put a transflag on my social media profiles or something similar that would still least to confusion at least for cis people, they’d prob either assume I was AFAB or want them to use female pronouns to refer to me. But I’m guessing now the trans community at large wouldn’t have any issue with that either.