So I opened up at work to some people how bad things have been with some higher ups, part of my stress is coming from work and how powerless I am to control a situation that was related to yesterday afternoon.
There was agreement in place to mitigate and manage the situation but that didn’t work yesterday and I was subjected to a lot of stress even with the aid of someone with me.
I had to make it clear that I need to be supported at work because inevitably the root cause of the problem is coming from work and they need to support me better because it’s coming from work, I don’t believe that I should be seeking external help when the problem is actually coming from work.
and getting help from within a system that enables mean people
usually does not work.
But asking politely for it to stop and for help is a very important psychological step, this is so you can tell yourself you went through all the right steps, you tried and you are not to blame for the abuse.
Next step is getting outside help and planning to leave, leave to another job in your own time. You don’t get a medal for having no income.
and while a hug might sound a little trite a hug means you have internets people who understand and care and want to ease your stress and situation and this is one the ways we can help 😘😘😘
It sucks to hear what you’re going through and it’s good to hear you’re trying to do something about it. I hope things get better, either by resolving things at work or finding somewhere better
I was talking about it and then I guess it sort of fell out of my brain and mouth and I starting just saying things and was getting emotional about it all.
I felt strongly that I needed to be looked after better.
It sounds like work is uninterested in being proactive or doing much after you’ve told the what you need. Given that it’s just 15 work days til this problem goes away, any chance of a drs cert to cover off at least a few of those days so you can reduce the stress load? I totally understand how draining and stressful it is when you are at the mercy of an unreasonable, nasty person at work. I ultimately ended up leaving and from what I hear that person has simply gotten worse and nastier…
I’ve already burnt and used my allocated days off over the last couple of weeks without having to produce a certificate.
I don’t know what I could take off with what reasons. In a lot of ways I feel like I’m fighting a losing battle but if I go missing as well that would signal that I probably lost it and gave up.
It’s 3 weeks left then the problem goes away so I probably have to summon the strength to endure it however nasty and unpleasant it may be.
The worst thing it happens in the last 5-10 mins of each day. It’s not the way I want or like to end the day.
Work is doing what it can but I think at the same time they’re only half measures. I’ve only just realised today that this person has no concept of ownership over their own actions and responsibilities or accountability. They’re perception is so warped that they can’t even comprehend that the last month of their behaviour has been bad.
I’m hoping something happens or changes soon but that’s like hoping for a miracle.
Gosh this person seriously sounds abusive. Any way you can maybe try and go for a bathroom break or disappear early? Just to limit contact with this person as much as possible. I’m getting the sense work can’t move this person on and they’re clearly not receptive to change either.
The perception of having lost or given up doesn’t matter as much as your ongoing mental health, you need to be able to power through the remainder of the year and be well enough for next year, and if that means getting a Dr to just write up a mental health sickie for 3 days (they never need to put the reason why on the cert) I would personally go for it. Life is too short and precious to be worried about perception IMO when you’re as seriously affected as you’ve been describing
So I opened up at work to some people how bad things have been with some higher ups, part of my stress is coming from work and how powerless I am to control a situation that was related to yesterday afternoon.
There was agreement in place to mitigate and manage the situation but that didn’t work yesterday and I was subjected to a lot of stress even with the aid of someone with me.
I had to make it clear that I need to be supported at work because inevitably the root cause of the problem is coming from work and they need to support me better because it’s coming from work, I don’t believe that I should be seeking external help when the problem is actually coming from work.
Asking mean people to not be mean
and getting help from within a system that enables mean people
usually does not work.
But asking politely for it to stop and for help is a very important psychological step, this is so you can tell yourself you went through all the right steps, you tried and you are not to blame for the abuse.
Next step is getting outside help and planning to leave, leave to another job in your own time. You don’t get a medal for having no income.
I’m counting down the days till I can be free, 15 more work days.
For context I’m not dealing with an adult.
so many hugs
and while a hug might sound a little trite a hug means you have internets people who understand and care and want to ease your stress and situation and this is one the ways we can help 😘😘😘
deleted by creator
I’m doing everything I can to protect myself legally as I do have concerns for that.
Counting down, 15 more days left and I won’t have to deal with it anymore.
It sucks to hear what you’re going through and it’s good to hear you’re trying to do something about it. I hope things get better, either by resolving things at work or finding somewhere better
Just wanted to chime in and say I’m proud of your for advocating for yourself. ✨
I was talking about it and then I guess it sort of fell out of my brain and mouth and I starting just saying things and was getting emotional about it all.
I felt strongly that I needed to be looked after better.
It sounds like work is uninterested in being proactive or doing much after you’ve told the what you need. Given that it’s just 15 work days til this problem goes away, any chance of a drs cert to cover off at least a few of those days so you can reduce the stress load? I totally understand how draining and stressful it is when you are at the mercy of an unreasonable, nasty person at work. I ultimately ended up leaving and from what I hear that person has simply gotten worse and nastier…
I’ve already burnt and used my allocated days off over the last couple of weeks without having to produce a certificate.
I don’t know what I could take off with what reasons. In a lot of ways I feel like I’m fighting a losing battle but if I go missing as well that would signal that I probably lost it and gave up.
It’s 3 weeks left then the problem goes away so I probably have to summon the strength to endure it however nasty and unpleasant it may be.
The worst thing it happens in the last 5-10 mins of each day. It’s not the way I want or like to end the day.
Work is doing what it can but I think at the same time they’re only half measures. I’ve only just realised today that this person has no concept of ownership over their own actions and responsibilities or accountability. They’re perception is so warped that they can’t even comprehend that the last month of their behaviour has been bad.
I’m hoping something happens or changes soon but that’s like hoping for a miracle.
Gosh this person seriously sounds abusive. Any way you can maybe try and go for a bathroom break or disappear early? Just to limit contact with this person as much as possible. I’m getting the sense work can’t move this person on and they’re clearly not receptive to change either.
The perception of having lost or given up doesn’t matter as much as your ongoing mental health, you need to be able to power through the remainder of the year and be well enough for next year, and if that means getting a Dr to just write up a mental health sickie for 3 days (they never need to put the reason why on the cert) I would personally go for it. Life is too short and precious to be worried about perception IMO when you’re as seriously affected as you’ve been describing