You are still you, you can speak human language that you already know, and you know how to speak duck.
You have to learn how to be a duck. This means you gotta learn how to fly, hunt food, etc.
I’d walk to a lemonade stand to see if they had any grapes.
Then (and I cannot emphasize this enough) I’d waddle away.
It’s been 84 years…
Put on a blue cap, blue nautical shirt; but, and I can’t stress this enough, NO PANTS.
But for gods sake, wrap yourself in a towel after you shower.
Open a wine bottle, maybe? Put the corkscrew to use.
“Bro, you see that duck over there? It stole my wine bottle”
“Do you want it back? It’s already open now.” “You know what? I think I’ll pass.”
“Get back here, I want it back!!”
Quak
Quack?
Quack :)
you’re learning!
Yay!
Eughm, QUARK
What beautiful lobes you have.
Quack
Quack
Came here to quack, was not disappointed
Waddle around the pond hitting up old folks for bread that is unhealthy for my diet and nipping at the toes of small children.
Quack
Check if my quack has an echo
Crime
Pick one person at a time and speak to them in human language. In some cases it will be to give them a special magical friend, in other cases it will be to cause them to question their sanity.
Then I’d get to seeing about this whole corkscrew dick thing.
I would learn to fly and then fly to one of those parks where secret service agents meet. Become a spy and sell the intelligence I gather.
I start wondering if I’m ugly.
FLY!
Damn, 3 hour old post and no one said FLY!? Ya’all need to be ducks more often…
Probably contacting some media outlets to try and monetize my talking-duck status, and wondering if if my life expectancy is on par with duck or human.
Do you want to end up being dissected in a government lab? Because that’s how you get dissected in a government lab.
Probably open up my phone and pull up youtube to watch some duck documentaries. I don’t even know what I’m supposed to be eating or what things out there are usually wanting to eat me.
There are some really good “I just woke up as a duck” tutorials on Coursera.
