spoiler
alt text: A two panel comic. In the first panel there are two buttons labeled “I don’t believe in prescriptivism” and “‘Literally’ cannot mean ‘figuratively’”. A finger hovers between the buttons. In the second panel, the finger’s owner is sweating and wiping his brow, unable to decide.
I take the pessimist position, which is similar to yours, but I still hate people who don’t do what I want.