A shark can swim faster than me, but I can outrun a shark. So in a triathlon it comes down to the bicycle part.

I like the scan and go in the Sam’s club app. Scan the items with your phone, and if the QR code receipt is visible when you walk through the gate thing they usually wave you on without a person checking.

They are about as accurate as a coin toss

Now that everyone has been reminded about trump, the dnc can run the same candidates from before and people will know to go with it this time, right?

I have a modest proposal that might take care of that liability

Defamation lawsuits are really hard to win, losing one doesn’t prove the other party was truthful

So if I don’t walk to work I don’t have to turn the lights off

The Colorado avalanche subreddit having more than 2 people

Once computers became powerful enough to post memes there was no need to keep upgrading them.

What is your favorite deck

What is your favorite joker

What is your favorite spectral card

As long as your tongue works

Well except for having holes in your feet

At the door to Burger King

If you don’t then your dashboard doesn’t know to get rid of the speed limit sign

Polyjuice

A fish without a bicycle won’t do well in a triathlon

Here I am

DP is Diet Pepsi

Wide area progressive, when slot machines across multiple casinos contribute to one combined jackpot.

Wasn’t this a Netflix movie