This also applies to Warhammer dwarfs. Truly the dwarfiest of dwarfs.

“Forced to deny he is not” == “Forced to admit he is”

This isn’t a LinkedIn lunatic. This is about as sane as one can behave on LinkedIn without deleting it.

Will the real SLLM Shady please stand up?

Luckily we have Fox News and random strangers on the internet who are willing to magnanimously inform us about the desolation of our own city.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go scavenge for hot dish in the smouldering ruins of Saint Paul.

Fun fact: While shooting this scene, Peter Jackson wanted Sir Christopher Lee to scream. However, Lee corrected Jackson: “Have you any idea what kind of noise happens when somebody’s snuck up on by a tree? Because I do.”

The Shakespeare veteran then proceeded to give an in-depth summary of the Battle of Dunsinane.

Because the youth group was serving it with free donuts—it’s pretty much the reason I went. To be fair, they were really nice; it was just a bizarre experience. I didn’t realize you could just inherit a church and declare yourself a pastor without any formal training.

After looking up how much money my local megachurch took in last year ($60 mil) versus how much they spent on charity ($3 mil), I think you were probably justified.

When I was a freshman in college, I let this youth group convince me to visit their weird church. The “pastor” was a young guy who spent the entire sermon talking about how he squandered his time in college before eventually dropping out. Fortunately, the old pastor took pity on him and gave him a job as an assistant—running errands, cleaning, etc. Then one day the old pastor died, so our hero basically just took over since no one else wanted to.

When it was done he tried to sell us bags of stale coffee.

Surely this AAA-budget live service game with a terrible premise won’t faceplant immediately and force us to close the studio…but let’s make it an MMO, just to be safe.

But they were all of them deceived, for another handmaiden was made…

Does the potion have a wait-list and cost $350 per draught?

Can you burn a Jeezi board?

That’s funny, I just watched a Tasting History episode that advised against death by misadventure.

Sounds like a rogue black hole

Man, I don’t know what I’d do without Aldi. Ironic that the best grocery chain in America is European, when the American Grocery Store used to be such a symbol of U.S. prosperity.

You’re not old until the music you don’t consider old becomes old.

I had to dissect a bunch of things in high school: a frog, a pig fetus, a cow heart, a cat… I’m still not entirely sure what the intent was. “Yup, the brain is in the right spot. Always good to check, just in case.”

If they want to teach kids knife skills they should do so in home ec. At least make something edible.