i’m asking OP not to feel self deprecating about having taken that specific help. replying to this specific comment. Where* I understood it as them feeling undeserving of something that is extremely common but presented as unusual. which could close them off to seeking or accepting similar help in the future. if it came off as dissmisive of their post and experiance, that was not the intent. and i apologize to OP if they feel i was missing their perspective here.

nepotism is how everyone gets it done. the image of some self made man is utter bullshit. it’s popular because it makes someone feel like their better than you. don’t feel self concious about how you got that for a second. though i’ll aknowledge the bottom of a depression cycle is a shitty place to stop believeing in bad luck, or that a that a lot of sucessful looking people are all show. sounds like you’re in the pick a reason to get out of bed and shower, then force yourself to do it stage? i hate that stage, it’s exhausting.

/mnt/external_ssd_1/git_repos/reponame

i trust my workstations os to still be working in the morning as much as i trust the chances i even published the stupid branch after making it.

it’s gonna depend on the size of your work place really. hr isnt so much the group that is a resource for you the human. think of them like the IT dept that manages the human resource. if you’ve plainly stated your boundry to that person. “it’s not your business what my mood is, if your uncomfortable with me not behaving in the excited mannor you want. that is a you problem”. it’s on your manager to ensure the other person respects that boundry. and if your manger doesnt do that, hr should definitely care because thats a problem. that said. it’s far easier for everyone to just say “smile more, we’re a family and we all behave the same way” in smaller org. and you’ll have to decide if staying in a place that wont respect you boundries is healthy. my work pays me to complete specific things, not fill in someone’s social circle because they need a trapped audiance to maintain friendships. i was lucky in my current org to have a manger who caught a situation like you describe happening to me and take zero nonsense from the other person. and now that i’ve worked with that expectation, with someone who would enforce that, i’m not willing to consider my persoanl life part of what the org is paying for.

it is, but when you’re 10 comments deep they got you… and now we’re 13 comments deep, what have i done! nnnoooo

dude stop feeding the trolls

because the system is working as designed and it’s incentives keep a lot of people favoring it. but the alternative fast solutions everyone loves to wax philosphical about. well that movie always ends with this really weird wide angle shot of a field. theres this big mound of fresh dirt people are celebrating the victory around. but all our favorite anarchist charaters are missing and nobody can tell me why they got written out at the last minute.

people like your boss are awesome. managing their macs pays so stupid well, it feeds my linux home sever upgrade habit.

can we just set up a bot that does nothing but reply with these two comments to every “why no 3rd parties bro” question. We’ll turn it on three months before every US election and let it travel around lemmy servers. then turn if off until this whole cycle repeats.

because thats the lived reality of how the us political system works right now. the actual options may not be great. telling my gay friends their marriage may need to stop existing all together for little bit, so I can pretend I took a stand against the system with a socialist party vote is some childish nonsense. yes we need systemic change. thats a conversation with receptive people who need to be in positions to do something in the first place. its that or 3rd parties take themselves seriously and focus locally. in my area there a man dress as a fucking pirate every cycle for the socialist party. its him or a democrat, those are the options on the left. we can play make believe hypotheticals or start having actual discussions about this shit next month. this is not that moment, that moment was 3 years ago but it required effort. this is act with empathy or throw a temper tantrum time.

guys at work comlaining about their divorce to anyone entering an enclosed room. four different times when i was forced to work in an office and twice so far in slack. mother fucker i dont known you but i already get why she left. stop trying to force random people to be your therapist.

It’s this uninvited commenting on the bots part that has me downvoting it. It’s presenting itself at an authority here. If a user in the comments called the bot to fact check something and the bot did a bad job, i’d just block the bot. I’d even be able to look over that users history to get an idea of the bot’s purpose. But this bot comes in and says “here’s the truth”, then spits out something i’d expect to see on twitters current itteration.

If the problem you’re trying to solve is the reliability of the media being posted here. Take the left/right bias call out and find a decent databse on new source quality. Start the bots post out with resources for people to develop their own skill at spotting bad news content.

If the problem you’re trying to solve is the visibility of political bias in content posted here. So the down vote button isnt acting as a proxy for that. Adding a function for the community to rate left/right lean like rotten tomatoes sounds interesting, so long as you take the reliability rating out of the bot. You can’t address both media reliability and political bias in one automated post. nyt and npr being too pearl clutchy for my taste. and some outlet that exists only on facebook having the same assumed credibility as the associated press. are wildly different issues.

*stupid phone, i’ll live with the spelling but not repeated words.

been using Darktable for years now. had the same trouble with it as people going photoshop to gimp have at first, because my brain was all in lightroom. once i sat down and watched some videos of people explaining their own darktable process and experimented new workflows. it became everything lightroom was, but without the constantly scolding me about bumping my subscription adobe did.

The first 3-6 months are like vegas, anything you and your partner say or feel in this period are exhaustion enduced and get forgotten. Until the baby can smile and act like a tiny human you just endure. Once it smiles and sleeps for at least 4 hours your brain will give the good chemicals and you both start to forget this time.

Honestly theres some great advice in this thread about perspective already. So being only three weeks in, i have one useful piece of real advice. Thats not a functional human yet, it cant move under it’s own power, it cant remember what happened 5 minutes ago. You can strap the infant in a car seat and walk the fuck away for five minutes. be in another room breathing. It can not follow you, it will not remember. Use this weakness against it while you can.

I’m in the same spot and 95% settled on moving to debian.

xubuntu has been good to me the last 10yrs. But its been about xfce, ubuntu got be part of the relationship because it was easy when i knew very little about linux. that and it can run well on a potato with a bunch of computer parts just duct taped randomly onto it. which is basically what my dumpster dived laptop was 10 yes ago.

thats just a short term fixes too though. the ads will get more intrusive and annoying. and at some point pro ads will just turning themselves back on. because this is a company and it wants to sell things.

cotton, wool, leather, modal and denim for me. found a tshirt i liked and just order 10 in the same color online when they wear out. same for jeans, socks, underwear and hoodies. rather dress like an npc than decide how annoying i’ll accept my clothes being day to day. leather boots, havent owned sneakers in 15 yrs. leather jacket for cool weather. merino wool sweaters and a long heavy wool coat for thundersnow season.

modal beats out cotton sheets to me, but unblended cotton is still pretty comfy. layers of merino wool blankets. finally managed to get leather furniture this winter and my livingroom is usable even when im having a bad day.

also ereaders and stone paper. after gritting my teeth and feeling gross because everything is written on dry scratchy hateful paper. being able to read or just write down a quick note comfortably was kinda life changing.

“it’s possible i buried a self delete timebomb in one of our repos years ago. enjoy looking for it just incase assholes”

was a bit of a running joke for years even before our son was diagnosted. but covid times offered the perfect period to hyper focus on researching his diagnosis. which led to reading all my old school records. finding all the vaugue language being used to dismiss my childhood behaviors that in his records, were used as the basis of a diagnosis. was an interesting “oh son of a bitch!” moment.

At this point in my life, i only put effort into maintaining two friendships. Both of which are a couple decades old now. One is ND at the very least. The other was diagnost as autistic about six months ago, to absolutely no ones surprise. We really do tend to drift into our own little social circles of peace.

“yeah, no shit. i though you knew this already”