damn, hearing it from someone else hits different. sometimes i yearn for the closeness of intimate friendships but the anxiety at the vulnerability of expressing a genuinely held opinion wont let me do anything else

the ocean collective, if you enjoy the more progressive stuff

phanerozoic i

phanerozoic ii

holocene

im almost 40 and my trick is to not try to fall asleep because if i try i end up staying awake longer due to frustration. i just watch youtube trombone tutorials until i pass out.

i bought mine from swappa, they seem to have a pretty decent support system for any potential fraud.

sorry, ive never left a comment like that before and didnt realize it would look off. thanks!

aside from some of the more obvious choices (rushdie, wallace, mccarthy, morrison):

don delillo, esp. underworld and white noise

ted chiang, esp. exhalation

marilyn robinson, esp. housekeeping

denis johnson, esp. jesus’ son and tree of smoke

colson whitehead, esp. the intuitionist and the nickel boys

and while relatively new so maybe not at the same status as some other writers, jamil jan kochai and nana kwame adjei-brenyah will be making lists like these in the future if they keep writing the way they have.

there is a website for a pizza place in seattle whose website does this, maybe you can get some inspiration. dinos

i dont remember where but i saw the first law recommended as a series that you could read in its entirety right now, as opposed to asoiaf. i read the original trilogy plus best served cold last year, and after the first book my wife asked me how it was and my comment was something about how thing finally started happening at the end. i also did not really enjoy the jezal chapters in the first book, and didnt mind them at best through the other two. still, overall id recommend them.

just walking from michel delving to celondim

could be worse

its a weird thing to talk about, because so many times i tried to confide in other parents, and every single time i just get “oh it sounds like a normal toddler” no matter how much contextualizing i could try. youre the first person who is not my wife whose heard the story and hasnt had that reaction, so thank you.

my wife had a rough end of the day yesterday. it was mostly a nice day with our daughter (turning 4 in may) while i was at work, then out of nowhere she got hit with “i dont love you” while they were transitioning between activities. no conflict or anything.

while trying to talk it out, my daughter started saying that my wife hit her in the face and pushed her in the pool on our trip to puerto vallarta in october which is completely untrue (besides me there were four other in-laws around us at all times during the trip so there wouldve been drama if that did happen). my wife broke down because she didnt know how to handle that (what if she decided to say that in front of a teacher?).

then she just dropped it. she didnt seem remorseful, and she also didnt even say i love you to her. so when i get home, almost like rubbing it in, she starts singing a song about how she loves me. this and the fact that i was diagnosed with adhd as a kid makes me feel guilty for making my wifes job way more difficult.

this is all compounded by my wife raising her voice at my daughter a couple of times recently. she has always been the kind of kid who pushes boundaries to the max, who always grabs things without asking, whose reaction to school pickup and ending a day at the park is to run away and make us chase her. the incidents of my wife raising her voice were when my daughter decided to run while she was on a busy avenue, because despite drilling it into her head every time we get to a crosswalk, we dont trust that she wont impulsively ignore what shes supposed to do. since then she has ssid a few times she didnt want mommy to be with us for breskfast, which she and i make together every morning, “because what if she gets mad?”

really sorry for the rant and a half here, but its been that kind of day. so, i love my daughter, but i really wish she could just learn to chill out.

i shop bulk as much as i can, eat oatmeal for breakfast daily, and after i had my gall bladder removed i got in the habit of eating 2-3oz portions of animal protein no more than 5 times a week. i spend a bunch of time in the kitchen every week but it definitely softens the blow. it also helps that i have a couple of cheap staple meals i can make for less than $5 per serving.

i also shop around for value. i live near 4 different grocery stores so i dont spend a lot of time doing it, but i do make a run to grocery outlet every month in order to get discounts on bigger items but it can be hit or miss.

i am desperately praying for a pineprinter

stephen or sandi?

furiously scratching out star rats haha yea i noticed that too

yea this definitely fits the description. brief summary: chapters alternate between the first chapters of different novels, and the main character (addressed as “you”) trying to track down the different novels whose chapters youve just read which are cut off for various reasons. it is great, relatively short (i think 250-ish pages in my copy), and if you dont mind the wild stylistic jumps between chapters its pretty delightful.

i think this is my third commemt, already almost equal to the amount i made on reddit in all those years i was there.

well this just hit me harder than it should have. i have been stressing about not having thoughts or opinions lately, and doing nothing to counteract that. just earbuds all day and all night whenever there is silence for more than 2 seconds.

fun might not be the right word, but I’ve been playing New Vegas and trying to throw out every piece of trash I can find. if adding an item to my inventory would cause karma loss, I use grab and move it over next to a trash can. I also separate the different kinds of trash, and in McCarran and Vikki and Vance I cleaned up the bar/restaurant areas by stacking plates and cups, and disposed of all cigarettes into ash trays. its… exhausting, really.