• PhobosAnomaly@feddit.uk
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    22 hours ago

    It works spectacularly well with people you’re close to or on very good terms with.

    If my other half is kicking off about something, a quick “hey listen, are you wanting help to fix this or are you wanting to vent like fuck to feel a bit better?”

    It’s rarely the former, though I’d be more than happy to help if it was. At least then I can let her rage out and decompress without throwing in unwanted suggestions.

    Probably comes across as a bit blunt to people you don’t know well though.

    • MrVilliam@lemm.ee
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      19 hours ago

      Glad my wife and I aren’t the only ones. It’s frustrating to explain why proposed solutions won’t work while already worked up over stressful bullshit. Sometimes there just aren’t real solutions. Sometimes you just need to open a pressure relief valve for a minute so you can have a little reset and be better equipped to tackle the mountain of bullshit.

      • PhobosAnomaly@feddit.uk
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        18 hours ago

        Yeah, it works both ways at the end of the day.

        I know fine well when I need to take some holiday days - I work with a team of fantastic guys and girls in a very bureaucratic environment, so any deviation from the norm in certain projects come with a raft of paperwork (an unnecessary volume in some cases), before the issue can really be put to bed.

        Everyone makes fuckups. I’ve made fuckups and caused by line manager paperwork when I was at the coalface, and I’ll continue to make fuckups and learn from them in the future. I know my spuds will drop a bollock every now and then, and that’s cool.

        There are times when someone has made a royal arse of something and it’s stacked another load of paperwork on top of me, and I get a bit angry about it. It’s not rational, it’s not fair to rag on the poor dude or dudette or dudethey who made an error, and I’ll let my partner know that I’m not after solutions - I’m just needing a bit of extra time to calm down and refocus. Solutions to those problems mean overhauling a heavy and entrenched system of work, and it’s not something that can be done at home - I could have married Kofi Annan, but unless he’s familiar with the system of work, there’s fuck all he could actually do.

        At that point, it’s time to book a week or two off, and think about anything - everything - but work.

        e: clarity