They missed so many opportunities to make it actually a nightmare. Adding these should help…
Standard plan:
- 2 DPI settings. (50, 32000)
Premium plan:
- 3 DPI settings! (50, 100, 32000)
- Ad Free!
Pro-gamer plan ($45/mo)
- Mouse acceleration toggle
- 1 customizable DPI settings (more available @ $5/mo each)
- Middle mouse click functionality unlocked! (Bound to backspace. Customizable binding @ $2/mo)
- AI tooltips to suggest when/where to click next. ($5/Mo to disable)
- Cloud backup*
*Requires Internet connection. Mouse falls back to standard plan and settings when not connected. Requires device reboot to re-enable subscription after disconnect.
Edit: formatting
$10 for unlimited scrolling!
No, you can’t disable AI, because “people want that” ™
How long could a mouse take to reboot, Michael? An hour?
Thanks Satan
At least this provider gives unlimited free scrolling!
Oh god oh no I used my last click now I can’t select a plan
Yes you can! Only $0.10 per additional click!
And how will I click that? Oh, it’s automatic! For our convenience!
“remind me later” works only if you double click it.
This is close enough to reality that I’m irritated.
Close enough? Ma dude, Logitech really wanted to do this shit, but has to backpedal after getting massive flak.
I didn’t believe you so I googled it and you are correct. For fuck sake…
Well, that’s the dumbest thing I’ve read in a while. I have a Trackman from 2004 that’s still plugging along, no subscription software updates required. If your stuff isn’t shit, it lasts forever anyways.
I have a mouse that plugs into a COM port as my 286 doesn’t have USB or PS/2. I’m not entirely sure how old it is, but I’d be surprised if it post dates 1990
Anyway, good luck making a forever mouse when the main cause for replacing mouses is their connector being out dated
Do not read aloud from a book that summons demons. Not even as a joke.
What will Premium Plus get for me?
Living in 2024, I’m not even sure if this is a joke or not. I wouldn’t be surprised if there’s a subscription for damn oxygen soon. Oh, wait, that’s taxes!
It’s only partially a joke. I can’t remember who but some company was bragging about their subscription based mouse they had in the works.
I can navigate with keyboard shortcuts.
I’m sorry, you are out of keyboard clicks.
I’ll just use my graphics tablet.
I’m sorry, you’re out of graphics.
Connect with rdp with my laptop with a touchscreen
You’re out of RDPs
I can cry.
☹️ but i cant click to subscribe.
It’s all fun and games, until it becomes real and people buy it, then all competitors align and it’s the new norm.
I’ve managed to pay under $20 for all I can click mice. They last more than a year typically. Even with tariffs, I’m getting a chinese mouse, and y’all can f the f off.
That honestly sounds like a bad deal. Before recently replacing it, I had a $35 dollar mouse that lasted through 12 years of heavy gaming. Either you are inhumanly rough on your mice, or you might want to spend a little bit more for something quality.
Is it HP mouse?
The image is of a Logitech MX master. But yes the meme is very HP coded.
It’s based off a very real Logitech statement.
I’m aware. But Logitech backed down on it. HP wouldn’t have.
Don’t give them ideas
Lol Logitech has already tried.
Wat
Jesus Christ
Nah, I already got the 24,99 family plan that includes 500 premium clicks every month. I just hope they don’t follow through with their crackdown on account sharing.
What do those premium clicks do?
When you click a button it’s actually two events, a button down and a button up. That is how you are able to grab something and move it, by clicking and holding and then later releasing.
Premium clicks include both the button down and button up events. Non-premium clicks are button down only.
Remember to unclick your buttons if you’re not paying for premium clicks. You wouldn’t want to continously keep reordering toilet paper from Amazon, would you?
